Posted By Bouhammer on September 3, 2010

Yes that is what it is…the smells here. There are a lot of senses that are familiarized with this place but I am convinced it is the smells that have the most meaning. I wrote about it a little already, but as I have spent several days in Afghanistan it is clear to me now that my nose is the gateway to past memories and even some flashbacks.

It is hard to explain to someone that has never been here, so I will try to use an analogy that many can probably relate to. Have you ever had a bad experience with a food or drink? I mean a really bad one. For many, Tequila has a lasting negative affect on people. Many people I know or have met have a “Tequila” story where they probably got really drunk on tequila at least once and from that got really, really sick. And ever since that moment every time they smell Tequila it brings back a flood of memories, usually very bad ones. Sometimes it even illicits a physical response.

Well that is kind of what it’s like. The smells here are numerous and many unlike one like a liquor or food. Here it is the smell of the dust, the burning trash, the diesel exhaust, a local national that hasn’t bathed, the chow hall food, and many others.

I have been walking or driving through the base and having one of those scents hit me and I find myself instantly taken back to a time 4 years ago. I mean not scary like I forget where I am kind of flashback, but just instantly reminded with the images and thoughts of a time past. Actually I spend a lot of time in traffic here (more of that in a later blog post) and while listening to Radio AFN Afghanistan on 94.1 I think back to a lot of times, good and bad. I remember guys on my team and certain missions; I remember my terps, and even my ANA.

There is a lot about Bagram that has changed since I was here last, but the smells have remained the same. When I was here before I used to like to get up early, grab a cup of coffee and go outside when the sun was coming up. I did this a lot when I was in Orgun-E. The air always smelled cleaner then, and it always seemed less dusty. This morning I got up at 4:30 AM and walked outside to the sounds of jet fighters taking off. I didn’t have a cup of coffee, but the air seemed clean, the afterburner flames were awesome looking coming out of the back of the jets and the sun was just starting to lighten the sky.

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Posted By Bouhammer on September 2, 2010

When I was here before I used to like to get up early, grab a cup of coffee and go outside when the sun was coming up. I did this a lot when I was in Orgun-E. The air always smelled cleaner then, and it always seemed less dusty. This morning I got up at 4:30 AM and walked outside to the sounds of jet fighters taking off. I didn’t have a cup of coffee, but the air seemed clean, the afterburner flames were awesome looking coming out of the back of the jets and the sun was just starting to lighten the sky.

I am not normally a morning person because I am usually up late at night, but the mornings here are worth getting up for, if you are in the right place. When I was in Sharana, I didn’t get up early a lot because really there was no reason to there. The air never smelled clean and since we were surrounded by HESCOs, you never really got to see the sun rise.

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Posted By Bouhammer on August 31, 2010

That look, the one that soldiers have as they are moving to and from a combat zone. If you have been around this type of environment, then you know what I am talking about.

I notice that many of the soldiers and marines walking around in Kuwait seem to have “that look”. It is hard to describe, but it seems to be a cross between weariness and determination. Going to the latrine, walking to the PX or sitting the chow hall, you see it everywhere. You can see that a vast majority of the people here have a lot of time in a combat zone. I mean more than one tour. They have the look like this is #2, 3, or possibly 4 or more.
The young pups who may be heading over the first time have that eager “I can’t wait to get there” look. They have more of an excited with anticipation look. 

I could be wrong and this “look” could have been there for a while and maybe I just never noticed it when I was in uniform. Maybe I see it differently now that I am out of uniform. Maybe it is nothing new at all. But it sure seems that way to me. However I seemed to have noticed it enough that I wanted to write about it. It just seemed to stick out to me. 

If you know what I am talking about or can relate or have an opinion on it, please leave a comment. I will do my best to reply when needed. 

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Posted By Bouhammer on August 29, 2010

The closer I get to Afghanistan, the more the memories come back. Walking through the moon dust of Kuwait, the smell of Diesel generators, the smell of the handwashing area before you go into the chow hall, the Chuck Norris jokes on the bathroom walls, oh and the HEAT. 

I thought it would take a couple of days to get used to the weather here, but it seems it only took 24 hours. Last night when I was walking around I thought the heat was intense. I was sweating like a pig. 

I went to bed about the time that the sun came up and slept until noon. I needed to get some decent chow plus I had to pick up my SAPI plates for my body armor and check on flights. When I awoke I looked at the thermostat for the AC to my the tent, which happens to be near my bunk and thought someone had turned it up since it was showing 83 degree. I went to turn it down and saw it was set to 71 degrees. So I figured it was failing and I would need to move, but then I went outside and quickly realized why it was 83 degree. 

I think it was about 115-120 outside and very humid. The heat was so intense it almost took your breath  mostly because of the humidity. Luckily I also have a decent tan built up from my recent vacation otherwise I think I would have burned up in the 30-40 minutes I spent walking around outside today. I tried to stay in the shade as much as possible and pretty much had a bottle of water in my hand whenever I could. There is no shortage of bottled water here, the trick is finding the cold ones in the coolers. 

So as the sun fell tonight (since I am still here after getting bumped off my first flight) I went outside and felt very comfortable. I was pretty surprised at how good it felt outside. The temp is pretty much the same, but after walking around today when it felt like God himself was chasing me with a hair dryer on high, this evening feels good. I might even go have a coffee at the Grean Bean after this. 

Well my time on the internet is winding down with just a few minutes left. I hope this is my last blog post from Kuwait and that my next one will be from Afghanistan. I am all ready for there, I even picked up a new reflective belt last night at the PX so that I am totally equipped for the land of the FOBBITS. 

Until Next Time…

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Posted By Bouhammer on August 28, 2010

So now the trip has started. A trip that I think really started 11 months ago when I left my career in Information Technology for this new one where I support the warfighter. The warfighter that I can no longer support directly since I have retired from the Army, but one I can support now in what I do. I may no longer be a First Sergeant for soldiers anymore, but I can make sure that I am doing all I can to help save their lives and take lives of the enemy.

Some have asked me “why” I am going back. They have said things like “your war is over” or “what do you need to prove” or “why can’t you just stay in the US”. I am not sure of the answers I have given each time I was asked something like that, but I can tell you the short answer to all of that is because “it is my job”. If not me then whom? Just because I may no longer be a leader of troops doesn’t mean that I have to walk away from them. The military is my DNA, plain and simple. Those who know me, know that. Some may not like it, but hey…it is what it is.

The most important thing to me is what my wife and boys think, not anyone else. Does my youngest son want me to stay at home? Sure he does, but I also know he is proud of what I do and admires my service. He may not totally grasp what I do right now or why I do it, but he will.
I know this to be a fact because I have seen it happen twice already. My oldest son who at one time sat in the unit parking area on the hood of the car wearing my helmet minutes before I boarded a bus to go somewhere did what was in his heart and followed me in the Army. He served honorably as medic for six years to include a year in combat saving lives and even trying to take a few while he was at it. My military service shaped his youth and now his own experiences have made an impact on the rest of his life.

My middle son who was born in a military hospital and “grew up” as a true military brat has witnessed everything from a bad parachute jump to me rendering honors to my fallen soldiers. He has also made his own decision to join the military and is hoping to be accepted into West Point or at least get into a ROTC program at a university. Both of them did this without motivation by me or my wife, just like I made my own decision to join and come home to tell my parents when I was in high school.

My lovely wife who will be postponing the celebration of our 19th wedding anniversary until I get back has stood by my side since day one. When we got married I was in uniform so there was no doubt what she was getting into. She has been the rock for me on many occasions and she is the central pillar that holds the house up all the time, especially when I am gone.

So as long as they accept what I do then I am good with it. Again, they may not like it all the time and at times may get worried, but they accept it. They know my passion and they understand it. For everyone else….sorry you don’t get it.

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Posted By Bouhammer on August 27, 2010

As you read this blog entry I will already be on my way back to Afghanistan. It has been a little over 3 years since I left the country and now I return. Granted it is only for a short stint compared to my last time in country that lasted a year, but I am still going back.

This time I am also going as a civilian versus as a soldier like before. The journey I have taken to get this far has been a long and frustrating one. Going over as a civilian is much tougher than as a soldier. When you go as a soldier, the military has people waiting to check off every box. You go through a process called “Soldiers Readiness Checks” which is usually a big room full of tables with people behind them that handle every step; legal, dental, medical, etc. You also go to “classes” to ensure that you have all the latest information.

As a contractor working for the Department of the Army, I pretty much had to do all those things that are handled in the readiness checks and the mobilization training myself. I have been working towards this trip trying to complete everything since April. Granted not full time, but as I got closer and closer, more hours every week were committed to getting ready to go.

I will miss my family very much and they have made it clear they will miss me. In fact, last night as I was packing and getting gear ready my youngest son looked at me and said “Daddy I don’t want you to go” and I told him I would be back soon and explained that the amount of time that I would be gone would be very, very short compared to last time. He seemed ok with that, or maybe he just realized his desire was just not to be.

Speaking of gear, the task of packing brought back some flashbacks and memories. As I went through old military gear that would be needed on this trip back to the ‘Stan; the smells, the handling of it, even the sight of some of it that has been packed away in several footlockers all made me remember things. Not necessarily bad things, some were funny or neutral memories. Heck, even some gear released the Afghan dust and dirt that was still embedded in it as I handled it.

So as I packed the duffel bag, sorted through what I would need and what would not be carried on this mission (different than any other I had ever done), I reminisced. Most of the time was by myself in the basement with the music playing.

But now the duffel is in the belly of this Delta Airlines jet instead of strapped to a pallet on the back ramp of a C-130. My personal bag is no longer camouflaged and issued by the Army, but is instead made of soft black leather. The meal on the flight was not an MRE, but instead a meal from the airline which kind of made me wish I had an MRE.

The blogs on this website over the coming weeks will be primarily dedicated to documenting my trip. I will do my best to scribe every impression, thought, and observation I have of life today back in the ‘Stan (at least where I will be located). For the most part I think they will be boring as I don’t see them letting me anywhere back to the game of hunting the enemy, dang it. No matter how much I would love to do that, it is not my purpose this time. Besides I didn’t bring all of my gear needed for that anyway.

Bouhammer Out..

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Posted By Bouhammer on August 26, 2010

There is a lot of money spent on new toys, gadgets, weapons, etc. for the war in Afghanistan. Some of them are loved and some are thrown to the side by the soldiers/marines. Some are only used by special operation forces and some are issued to everyone. 

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